inward struggle.

Am in a process of learning to be more patient in any situations I am in. And trying to be so cool that I can restrain myself in facing someone who annoys/nauseates me. Lately, sgt geram dkt beberapa manusia. Cuba utk tidak geram dkt mereka, tp hanya geram akan tindakan mereka, yg mmg suka mencari pasal, dan tidak senang dgn kesenangan hati org lain. Bak kata Naz, "some ppl are not happy w/ themselves that they want other ppl not to feel happy also". Heh. Plg sgt geram dkt diri sendiri bila kte tk dpt nak control nafsu amarah sehingga kte TERrespond dgn tidak berhikmah pada pencarian pasal itu. Kadang2 tu sampai terlepaskan dkt org lain yg kebetulan berada di setting yg sama. Ugh. What a disappointment. Lagi2 bulan ramadan ni. Bila tk dpt kawal nafsu amarah, rasa mcm, astaghfirullah, argh tk best nyaaa. As if tk dpt nak capai target puasa tu gara-gara ter-marahhh. Well, ragam manusia mmg mcm2. Itu bukan dlm kawalan kte. Tp nafsu amarah? Yes, indeed, kte boleh control!

"A person is not to be blamed for his nature. Rather, he is to be blamed if he acts according to his nature. " -- al-Junayd.

Now that you've red it, do pray fer meh, will ya? So that I'll be able to changeee this nature. Dan supaya saya kuat utk berubah wpun ada kritikan-kritikan manusia yg tk membina. Heh.

Some related Latihan Kendiris..
1. Guard the prayer ie awal waktu dan penuh purity.
2. Guard the tongue -- Musharatah (condition phase): meletakkan syarat pada lidah utk tk mengumpat, menipu dan memberi respon yg inappropriate kpd manusia2 yg ingin mencari pasal dgn niat utk memuaskan hati sendiri, etctetc. Murabatah: guard the condition. Muhasabah!: account yr deeds!

(view full presentation: Agenda to Change).

Lagi satu tips, sebelum tidur, maafkan org lain. Selepas bangun tidur, maafkan awal-awal org lain yg bakal mencari pasal dgn kita. Rezeki murah ooohhh.

Oh yea, ini sekadar peringatan utk diri sendiri yg dikongsi dgn harapan ianya bermanfaat kpd org lain. Would you call me a hypocrite if I (subconsiously) contradict myself? Pls, kalau ada yg rasa I'm being hypocrite ke apa, pls, tegurlah directly or indirectly. Pls pls pls jgn backbite pretty pls. That would harm yr heart. Sy juga ter-backbite kadang2, tp sedang berazam utk tinggalkan semua tu. Tlg doakann. Kalau sy ter-ajak korg backbite/benda-benda tahpape, tlg persetankan/abaikan.

Will you hate me? Dawud Wharnsby

PS; sgt kagum dgn org yg sentiasa chill out, dan tk terkesan / tk menzahirkan kesan tatkala ada org menguji tahap kesabarannn. selalu igt Allah = tenang = cool.

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